Friday, December 10, 2010

Sarah Vick?


I am totally hyped for my "birds" going into Big D this Sunday and taking on the Cowgals. Here is hoping that my main man, Michael Vick, chuck and ducks out another win for the birds. (Did I mention that I hate the Cowgals?)

Michael Vick is a perfect segue into my next post, because I want to talk about my girl Sarah Palin and an interesting double standard being played out in A-merry-ca.

Unless you have been living on another planet you know by now what Michael Vick was accused -and ultimately found guilty- of. He served two years and lost a hundred million dollars for his mistreatment of Fido. But thankfully, and with all due respect to F. Scott Fitzgerald, there are second acts in American lives. And Michael Vick is burning up the stage while he plays out his. But I digress.

Sarah Palin has been torturing animals and killing them for sport as well, and she is a hero to a lot of people here in A-merry-ca. Why? Where is the outrage for this heartless killer? Sadly, it took a Hollywood screenwriter to point out our willful hypocrisy:

Unless you've never worn leather shoes, sat upon a leather chair or eaten meat, save your condemnation."

You're right, Sarah, we'll all just go fuck ourselves now.

The snotty quote was posted by Sarah Palin on (like all the great frontier women who've come before her) her Facebook page to respond to the criticism she knew and hoped would be coming after she hunted, killed and carved up a Caribou during a segment of her truly awful reality show, Sarah Palin's Alaska, broadcast on The-Now-Hilariously-Titled Learning Channel.

I eat meat, chicken and fish, have shoes and furniture made of leather, and PETA is not ever going to put me on the cover of their brochure and for these reasons Palin thinks it's hypocritical of me to find what she did heart-stoppingly disgusting. I don't think it is, and here's why.

Like 95% of the people I know, I don't have a visceral (look it up) problem eating meat or wearing a belt. But like absolutely everybody I know, I don't relish the idea of torturing animals. I don't enjoy the fact that they're dead and I certainly don't want to volunteer to be the one to kill them and if I were picked to be the one to kill them in some kind of Lottery-from-Hell, I wouldn't do a little dance of joy while I was slicing the animal apart.

I'm able to make a distinction between you and me without feeling the least bit hypocritical. I don't watch snuff films and you make them. You weren't killing that animal for food or shelter or even fashion, you were killing it for fun. You enjoy killing animals. I can make the distinction between the two of us but I've tried and tried and for the life of me, I can't make a distinction between what you get paid to do and what Michael Vick went to prison for doing. I'm able to make the distinction with no pangs of hypocrisy even though I get happy every time one of you faux-macho shitheads accidentally shoots another one of you in the face." [Source]

I could not have said it better myself.


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